Day 28 - Hell

Sunday July Twenty-sixth
    Well one day turned into the next in an unremarkable fashion and I was still sitting by the shoe shining stall, still waiting, the only difference was I was getting more and more tired. Four hours of sleep is so little! My brain was slow and my eyes couldn't focus on much for a long time. There was so much movement, energy, and noise around me but I was just there in the middle, quiet and basically lifeless. Then, incredibly, things started getting worse. Ever since my trip to the Amazon and that horrendous bout of food poisoning my bladder just hadn't quite been...right. I needed to go far more urgently and frequently, and it was getting worse. Now it had become very, very bad, and I couldn't rest for more than thirty minutes without needing to jump up and scramble to the bathroom with my two huge backpacks, which fitted into the stall like a square peg in a round hole. This situation rivaled the one in the Amazon, I was deliriously tired, mentally fatigued, physically ill, and desperately alone. It was indescribably awful.
     After about an hour of sitting near the shoe shiner and his stall, he asked if I needed help, or a phone to call someone to pick me up. It was such a randomly nice gesture that it actually managed to make me feel a little better, especially so because when he first addressed me I thought he was going to bother me somehow or ask for something as so many do in this country, but I learnt you have to treat everyone as if they're going to be like this guy, really nice!
     One o'clock finally rolled around and after what seemed like forever I tiredly went to the ticket counter. There was already a huge line that had formed in advance and I waited at the end, wondering if my bladder would hold, you spend so much of your time in airports waiting. Then a ticket agent came down asking if everyone had a boarding pass, I didn't yet so she moved me over to a different, thankfully much shorter, line. However it was incredibly slow and everyone at the front seemed to be doing something very complicated and time consuming, more so than just printing a boarding pass. I was suspicious and worried.
     When it was my turn I learnt my suspicions had been justified as I found out that they had overbooked the plane and they had no seats left. I quickly told them that I had checked in already at a machine, but they said that I hadn't. I didn't understand how that could be, but I later learnt that the machines are notoriously faulty and shouldn't be trusted. The enormity of this single sentence overwhelmed me, I had three more international connections to make, and I already had no extra time thanks to the Cuzco weather cancellation. As my heart sank into my toes I started trying to negotiate a ticket onto the next possible flight, but like the icing on the worst luck ever cake the next flight wasn't until 11:50 am, arriving a full 11 hours and 30 minutes after I was supposed to get in to Los Angeles, and nine minutes before my flight to Rarotonga left.
        I stood there having nothing left to say. My eyes welled up with tears, the lack of sleep, hunger, and bladder issue all made my feel like I would just melt into a puddle. I needed someone else, anyone, the cold plastic lady at the desk just wasn't cutting it. The awful severity of my situation was not lost on me. If I missed my Rarotonga flight not only would I have to pay $200 but I would also miss my family's connection, and have to wait a day and a half in Los Angeles for the next one. And it was all my fault! If I had just checked in online before I came, or acted on my gut instinct at the machine that something wasn't quite right! Oh how disappointed I am with myself! With no other choice I checked one bag, and took the ticket from the cold plastic lady who was so indifferent to my situation she didn't blink an eye as I began to full out sob in front of her.
       Then things got worse, because you know, why not at this point? I had already sunk so far below the lowest point I had ever been before that I was just in free fall off the edge of a cliff, I had the worst bathroom urge I had had and couldn't find a bathroom. Although eventually at the end of a maze of halls I managed to locate one, the stalls were too small for my bags, so being alone at the time I left them outside the stall and ran in, but was too late. With soaked pants I sat down and contemplated my situation, it seemed unreal, like I was in a dream, or it was happening to someone else. I was so done, just so, so done. Done caring, done feeling terrible, done travelling. And that was something I never thought I'd ever think.
       I rummaged through my bag for any other clothes but of course almost all of them were in the checked bag. It felt like I was cursed. I found some pajama shorts and a pair of pants that I got on the street back in Cuzco that gave my legs a rash. I put them both on, and threw my jeans in the trash. If only I could have thrown my whole situation away that easily.
       In utter exhaustion and misery, I walked through security and then through the empty three o'clock halls like a zombie. The cold plastic lady had given me a card that gave me access to the VIP Avianca lounge to 'make up for everything' but predictably when I got there I was told I could only use it for four hours, and I had six until my flight to San Salvador. I turned around and meandered out into the VIP lounge hall, sat down on the reflective white floor and burst into tears. The stress, exhaustion, and disappointment all coming out. I just kept thinking how no one in the world knew or cared about my situation in that moment.
       That made me realize that I was the only one that I could rely on, that I was the only one that could fix my situation. A small fire was lit and I started thinking rationally instead of emotionally, which was hard because my brain was working at about three words per minute, but I tried to think through my situation anyway.
       I decided that the first thing I had to do was to let someone know. I re-entered the lounge, started my four hours, and used a phone to call my parents. It was the middle of the night there too, but it was so so nice to hear their voices on the other end, no matter how grumpy they were at first at being woken up. Then they realized it was me and I told them what had happened. Mum was just sad for me, Dad was pretty disappointed in how I handled the whole situation. It was really nice to just download everything, it's amazing how much of the stress and sadness I was able to transfer away just by talking about it to people who really couldn't do anything from thousands of miles away. I hung up feeling like my downward spiral to hell might have just halted.
       I then decided to head to the gate of the flight I had originally booked, because as I had learnt from watching my favorite TV show, The Amazing Race, you're never 100% going to miss a flight until it leaves. I arrived just as they began boarding and kicked myself for not thinking of this sooner. I ran to the counter and asked if there was any, any way I could get on the flight. She said no, and to go away while she boarded everyone. I stepped away and watched crying (yet again), and brokenhearted as all those passengers boarded, blissfully unaware of how lucky they were! I somehow couldn't make myself leave the gate though, even though I didn't know what I was going to do, I couldn't give up! As the last of the passengers boarded I was getting desperate, and ran up to one of the passengers telling him my situation. Upon hearing my tragedy he immediately offered up his ticket, in what was one of the most selfless and nicest acts I have ever received. However I should've known those evil airport people wouldn't have any mercy, and told him he couldn't do that. Why? I shall never know, I had paid for a ticket onto that flight, they couldn't provide me one, and he was offering his. It seemed like they just wanted to be cruel to me.
       As the plane was being prepared to leave I still couldn't force myself away from the gate and the window, watching the plane, so close, yet so far. I pleaded my case again and again to the agents that arrived to help close the flight. Then one man took mercy and radioed to see if there were any seats, and merciful luck there were two free seats! My hopes skyrocketed for the second time! But then, for yet another inexplicable reason which I was never told, I was denied using one of those seats. Oh the unfairness! I had paid for a seat on that flight, there were two free seats, and yet I couldn't get on! Oh why, why why?! I watched through blurry eyes as the plane left.
       Now I was really screwed. I had three international flights ahead of me, four in the next four days, and I could do nothing but watch my last hope taxi away. The flame was extinguished, and I felt dark and empty. I went back to the exorbitant VIP lounge and sat in the comfiest chair in the world, with mahogany floors, TV's, attendants, soft music and a calming ambiance, a breakfast bar, and a small indoor garden, feeling worse than I ever had before. I was then forced to update my family on yet another failure.
        But I could not stay, there's no rest for the stranded! To another Avianca desk, to another unfeeling attendant, tears flowing from an unquenchable source. I had entered a new level of tired, a new level of frustrated, a new level of physical discomfort, a new level of disheartened.
        At one counter I met a guy that helped me communicate a little better with the agents, as I didn't know much airport lingo in Spanish. Meeting him made my situation a thousand times better, and once again I found myself unbelievably grateful to a complete stranger. He was in a sticky situation too, his ticket was a staff ticket, which he could only use if there was an empty seat on a flight, and he couldn't know that if he wasn't at the gate. He had already spent three days in and out of Lima airport waiting for an empty seat, a victim of the airport just like me.
         After we both failed at making headway in our situations at that gate we went to go get coffee. It was so nice to keep my mind off my situation that my mood improved ten fold. His name is Joseph and he is twenty-eight. He's from Ecuador, lives in DC, but spends most of his time travelling around the world as a mountain guide. He's even climbed Everest! I met a man who climbed Everest! We had coffee, played cards, and walked around the airport stores.

I will be eternally grateful to you Joseph! You turned four hours of hell into a time I actually enjoyed, which is amazing.
   

Joseph and I found these while looking around the airport stores!
     I don't know how many of you readers know about Paddington Bear, but he is an English storybook character who appeared Paddington Station in England with nothing but a suitcase with a tag that said 'Please look after this bear'. The story describes how he came from deepest darkest Peru, specifically Lima. I named my blog after this and was really, really tempted to buy a Paddington Bear from Lima, Peru even though they were $40!
      I had to spend another awful hour begging yet more heartless airport people at another desk called the Avianca Connections Counter, which is as awful as it sounds. I wanted them to move me to an earlier flight to L.A. through San Salvador that only had first class tickets, but they refused to upgrade me. I got pretty annoyed, they got annoyed back. In the end they were no help, probably because they didn't want to help, and eventually angrily told me not to come back.
     Then things got worse, Joseph left, and I was on a carousel of hell, going from counter to counter around the departure hallway pleading to be upgraded. I was done begging, but I just had to beg and beg again. Those airport people are awful. I didn't get anywhere, I was just going around in circles.
     Eight o'clock finally arrived, I had not slept in 26 hours, and only slept four hours in the last 36 hours. I was starving, my legs were almost unbearably itchy from my street-side pants, and I was incredibly worried about the fact that I wouldn't have easy access to a bathroom on the flight. I walked onto the flight like a zombie.
      The flight was over all too soon and I depressingly disembarked, dreading dealing with a whole new set of airport people. They have so much power, but so little brains, and hearts. I ran to the bathroom, and then checked the screen for the next flight to L.A. which was earlier than my current one. I started speed walking towards it as it left in under fifteen minutes, the humidity and heat aggravating the awful skin reaction my legs were having with my pants.
     I was ten feet away from the counter when all of a sudden the agent looked up and called out to me.
     "Adrianne Nicole Holland?" I was sure I was delirious and had heard him wrong,
     "How do you know my name?" I asked as I got to the desk,
     "I have your boarding pass for a flight that leaves for L.A. in ten minutes!"
     "What?" I said in disbelief, but he pushed a real boarding pass into my hands that had my name on it and was in fact for a flight that left in ten minutes. I was now very sure I was hallucinating. Slowly however as I waited in the boarding line I realized that it was true, and a wave of joy and relief washed over me that made me want to burst into tears all over again! I had a flight to catch! How, who? I didn't care I was so happy I started telling people all around me in a completely uncharacteristic way.

Everything made me incredibly happy, especially this grandma who dyed her hair purple. I don't even know why I found that so enjoyable... or why I took a picture to commemorate it...

     My beautiful plane that took me to L.A.
     This huge, ominous problem had just vanished in thin air, a huge weight had been lifted off my shoulders. When I got to L.A. on time I couldn't believe it, I wasn't even mad when I learned the airline had lost my checked luggage, why not! It was so funny how everything had gone wrong, it's all part of the experience right? I really got the full airport experience.
       And then it was over. I saw my mum, dad, and brother for the first time in thirty days, and it was amazing. They all looked just the same, and that was comforting, but it also made me realize how much I had changed. As my dad took my backpack from me, it was like he was taking all of my worries and anxieties as well, and I suddenly felt such a wave of comfort and peace of mind, to a degree that I've never felt before.

        Together again with my incredibly unphotogenic family! Also my brother's not just incredibly paranoid about a plane crash, his life jacket wouldn't fit in the luggage. I also found out how I had come to have a boarding pass waiting for me in San Salvador. It turned out that my mum had arrived in LA at 9am and gone straight to Avianca and begged the agents there to get me onto the earlier flight. However, she had not been able to tell me as I was flying so was also thankful to The Amazing Race for inspiring me to go and check the counter just in case.
Then we all together walked over to check in for our flight to Rarotonga. Together, one cohesive unit. And I was telling them everything about my trip in pure delight, talking so fast. And I gave them all the presents I'd bought for them. We got onto our next flight with no more trouble, and I fell deep, deep asleep, and dreamed of only good things and Peru.

     Sunset from LAX. Just like the end of the day it signified the end of my troubles.

Day 27 - But I just got settled in

Saturday July Twenty-fifth

     I awoke after only four hours of sleep which was really hard, but it was my last day here so I wanted to enjoy every minute! The first last thing I had to do was go the big cathedral in Plaza de Armas which I hadn't done yet because you can only get in for free during mass which was from seven until nine which was way to early for me! However today I dragged myself up and got there right on time which is practically a first for me. Here's a picture I found online of it

      I wasn't allowed to take pictures inside but it was spectacular, the amount of gold in that place! It was like they were trying to see how much they could possibly put on every surface. Here's another picture I found online

       This was where the priest (apologies if that's the wrong title) was giving his sermon (apologies again) and it was just a really cool experience. There were tons of people there and it was interesting to see how different everyone was, old ladies were standing next to teenage boys, whole family units and single nobodies all came to worship their shared beloved faith. Catholicism here is like a type of blood that connects this whole country and feeds it's beating heart, and there is just something awesome about that!

I then went to a nearby café to have breakfast with U.S. Caroline and two new volunteers.

Monica & Sophia: A Spanish mother, Monica, and her daughter who grew up in California where they now live. Sophia is only fourteen. They were both really nice, awesome people! I think it's something about the fact that it takes a certain kind of person to travel all the way around the world to volunteer for the underprivileged that makes us all really like each other! I've never met such an awesome group of people! Oh so much nostalgia today!

        After breakfast we decided to go horse back riding around some old Incan ruins called Saqsyhuaman just outside Cuzco. It would be a great way to start Monica & Sophia's trip and a really great way to end mine. It was so great to be around horses again, they say you can tell if someone's a horse rider if they smell horse poop and think it smells good, well I did, it's that grassy smell you know means horse riding is soon! I got a particularly sassy horse with the best name, Cappuccino, but sassy is nothing hard for me to deal with as the horse I ride back in Colorado is literally named Sassy, and boy does she live up to that. One of her favorite games to play is to run laps around the pasture when I'm trying to catch her. So rude. 

         We walked up this little steep path that wound it's way through the countryside where there was nothing but trees and the occasional rural house. It was just such a cool change to hear nothing but silence after being in the city where taxis honk to tell you they're empty, to tell you they're full, and whenever there is a car in front of them. The air was clean and fresh and I just loved it!

Me and Caroline happily on our horses!

Me and Caroline appreciating the view!

Caroline

         We got back to the house around lunch time and I was planning to go help Caroline settle into her new home stay after lunch but irrational María told me I couldn't because it wasn't my house. I don't even know what that means or why that would have anything to do with it. I was actually pretty irritated at this point though because I really wanted to spend my last afternoon with Caroline, but there was no convincing her. Ugh!

        Instead I went to get some more presents that I hadn't found yesterday from a market and Caroline was going to come after she was done settling in. However she never came as María had told us the wrong time that Caroline would be able to meet. So glad I'm leaving today, or I think our relationship would have deteriorated further. We said our goodbyes at the house even though she was going to drive me to the airport, and she said I was one of the best volunteers she's had and gave me a ceramic teapot with a bear sitting on it, and a coin purse, I gave her a card. Then we went to the airport.

      I thought getting there an hour and a half before my domestic flight was pretty conservative but when I saw the length of the check-in line I thought it might not even be enough! The line was barely moving and it started to really worry me, I saw a representative of the airline walking down towards me and I was about to ask him but before I got the chance, he adressed everyone and told us that all flights had been cancelled. He didn't even give a reason her just said no one would be going anywhere. I was in shock. I had four connecting flights, four!

      The problem was I wasn't going home, I was going to meet up with my family in L.A. and fly directly to New Zealand to visit my entire family as we always do once a year. I just couldn't even comprehend the terrible domino affects of missing this crucial first flight.

      María luckily has had some experience with dealing with airport problems, having hosted so many foreign volunteers and pushed me right up to the front of the priority line, using my status as a minor to justify it, although it was only supposed to be for star alliance members. This line was ten times shorter but just as slow.

      While I waited I started talking to a nice old couple behind me in Spanish. They had been told that the flights had been cancelled because of the sunset, the sunset? That happens every single day! It must of been an excuse for some other problem that they didn't want to tell us or something because that's ridiculous! Anyway I kept talking Spanish to them and I kind of wanted to see if I could make them believe I was Peruvian so I pretended to speak English very badly, they were originally from Minnesota. This was going great, and they even offered to try and use their star alliance card to help me out. Unfortunately then María came back and it was reviled that I was actually American and had been lying. This was especially awkward because they had just offered me the use of their card. I tried to brush it of as having been lost in translation but I'm not sure they bought it. 

       At the front of the line I had to sneakily slide over to the non-priority counter and the lady there took pity on my connecting flight situation and got me onto another flight that left about ten minutes later. So I ran like the wind, shoving aside people and suitcases (not really) cutting in line (again) at security (really) and going so fast that I forgot to take off my money belt which contained about thirty coins going through the metal detector, so I had to run back out to the end of the conveyor belt, grab a tray, threw my belt in it run to the front of the line, cut again, and put the tray on the belt and then run through the metal detector again. Meanwhile looking like a complete idiot the whole time.

     I made it on just in time, and was the third to last. The two others who were about a minute behind me, and ran on without their shoes, were the nice old couple from Minnesota. They un-awkwardly got seats right next to and in front of me which was great... Oh Karma I'm sorry for duping old people!

     The plane took off and it suddenly hit me that I was leaving Cusco! I looked down at the city I had fallen in love with and felt deeply sad, I even cried a little, and the whole time I was thinking of that John Denver song.

        "Because I'm leaving on a jet plane

         Don't know when I'll be back again

         Oh Peru, I hate to go."

      Well that's how I sang it anyway. 

      The flight I had originally planned was direct from Cusco to Lima and then I had three others, one from Lima to San Salvador, then San Salvador to L.A., and then L.A. to Rarotonga where we had a three day stop over before continuing to N.Z. However the one the Cusco flight person had booked me on was a connecting flight through Aerequipa (further south) to get to Lima (north of Cusco). So that was annoying, but at least I could sit with the old couple during my layover in Aerequipa. They told me all about their life as missionaries and all the crazy things they did!

Thanks for overlooking the whole I'm Peruvian thing Ruth and Bill!

       Then the next flight to Lima, two of the now five flights that I had to take, and I got into Lima at around 10:30 but it felt much later due to the lack of sleep from last night. Then I walked over to a check-in machine as the counters didn't open until one am and so I used the machine, I scanned my passport in and it came up with my flights and I pressed check in, I thought that that would be enough, it told me at the very end to go to a counter and I assumed that meant so that I could check any bags I needed to. Happily I went and found a little nook between a wall and a shoe counter and settled in until one am.

Day 26 - Epiphany

Friday July Twenty-fourth
     The house just felt so empty this morning. Tommy, Hunter, German Caroline and her husband, and Lara have all gone. Lara only for a short trip to visit her boyfriend, but the rest permanently. It was just me and U.S. Caroline left, although I guess I don't need to distinguish between them anymore! How sad!
     My last day at work was also sad, I made my teacher and the teacher's assistant cards and got them cupcakes, and my teacher Jacky got me a cool Peruvian pencil case and the mom of the second most troubling kid in my class got me a really nice small shoulder bag and belt which was so nice of her. She probably knew how much patience it took! I then gave the kids each either a little toy car or a hair clip. It was so sad! I'd become really attached to them all, and I loved my job, kids are a never ending source of amusement, but it was also really satisfying to watch them learn and grow! It was also the last day of school for them before winter break and so I got dressed up yet again in traditional clothing and the whole school had a fiesta where we celebrated Peru's day of independence, which isn't actually until next week, so we had traditional dances and as per usual a ton of food. I didn't eat the food though as the traditional dress was tied really, really tightly!

Me and Jacky my classroom's teacher

Nataly and Adriana in adorable mini costumes!

Marcela and Nataly in matching costumes!

     In the evening I went out to a giant Artisan's market to get gifts for everyone back home as the local school were I had been teaching English had already started their winter break. Then I walked one last time back home, through the dirty rubbish filled streets lined with tiny shops where shopkeepers would try and sell you the same stuff as the next twenty stores. I had never really thought that much about poverty during this whole trip, seeing as my Kindergarten was so privileged, but I thought about it now as I was preparing to return to a first world country.
     So much of so many people's lives here is centered around survival. They have to constantly worry about where that next sol is coming from to pay for that next meal to give them energy for their next job to get that next sol for that next meal and so on and so on! It must seem like money is the most important thing in life.
     But the lack of money is not the most amazing thing I've seen here, it's how poverty brings people together, and how strong the communities are around here. How everyone looks out for everyone else. This kind of community centered society is exemplified in how they kiss each others cheeks when they greet, and are so warm and friendly to complete strangers like me! It's easy to think I'm better off than they are because I have an easier lifestyle, but I'm not sure that's necessarily true. In the U.S. as I'm sure it's true in other first world countries, since we have everything we could want and a seemingly infinite amount of time, we forget how important the simple things in life are and instead our lives are centered around the competitive need to be the most successful or the wealthiest. I've never really had any struggles or life changing experiences that put everything into perspective that are so common here, and because of that I don't think I know as well as people here what the value of life is, and I don't think I appreciate as much what's around us and what we have. It's a bit sad to think actually that the more you have the less you value it.

A picture from my pensive walk home.

       Me and Caroline talked a little more about María and we think that she just gets really really emotionally invested in people so that when things are going great they're going really great, and when they are bad she feels personally attacked to a degree that the other person never intended. Also she is just a really illogical person which doesn't help anything. So deep down she really does mean well but sometimes she gets so caught up in trying to do good that it ends up all bad.
       After dinner me and Caroline went out salsa dancing one last time to send me off and I was so sad and so happy at the same time! I really, really don't want to leave!

U.S. Caroline and me from another night :)

Day 25 - Come Back Caroline!

Thursday July Twenty-third
      It's funny that walking to work used to scare me, it's crazy to think how unfamiliar and strange this place used to be. Now it's so normal and familiar, the stands of fruit and black market books, the dirty streets packed with honking taxis, the crazy intersections. But even though it is dirty and loud, I don't want to leave! Can I just stay forever? I don't want to get nostalgic too soon though, I do still have two days left.
      Hunter facebooked me to say that she had made it back to the U.S. safely but had woken up disoriented, still thinking she was in Peru at first, but then sadly realised she wasn't. It was really sad for me too, to go to work alone!
       Work was good but I started to get nostalgic again, I'm going to miss all the kids so much!

The last boy is Dairon

Samuel and Nathan (pronounced Natan) are the identical twins

Here's another picture of them, un-confusingly their mother decided to dress them the same today. Great. Also love the look on Alejandro's face, haha!

Marcella and Nataly

       I came back at one, and was excited to go to my other job at the local high school in the afternoon, it was going to be my last day there! However I never got the chance to go.
       After I quickly ate lunch, my host mom María asked innocently enough if she could check in with me about how I was doing. Little could I imagine that this would turn into a three hour long intense conversation that bordered on almost being an argument, and her ranting about all the other volunteers. If I had known how awful this would be I would have escaped at the start.
       It all started with Lara, who wanted to come to my work with me again. Lara only works mornings in the orphanage and so had the whole afternoon free, it was also the last day the local school had class. However María was extremely mad at her when she asked if she could go. I tried to reason with María too but she just stated a bunch of really weird reasons back, she couldn't go because it wasn't her official job (even though the director of the school was fine with her helping me), she couldn't go because María wasn't her official ABV coordinator, or because the world wasn't as simple as I wanted it to be! Eventually we got down to the real reason, she was actually mad at U.S. Caroline and had just been expressing it toward Lara.
       Apparently U.S. Caroline had taken both Tommy and Hunter to her work without telling María. María was very upset by this because both Tommy and Hunter had agreed to go to U.S. Caroline's work because they had been unhappy in their work, and so María thinks that it was very wrong of them to just go to another person's work instead of coming to her and letting her help. This lead to a rant about Tommy, how he was evil and manipulative and so on. They had got into a fight a couple of days before he left so it is no wonder that she used such personal, emotionally charged adjectives but I personally have a very different impression of Tommy, as a calm, easy going guy who would never do anything that mean, I mean he did come half way around the world to volunteer which says something, but I wasn't there so I can't say.
         Then the Tommy rant lead to a Hunter rant, how she hadn't told her she was unhappy with her work, how she hadn't filled out the feedback survey at the end of her stay (I'm not sure María would have really wanted her review!) and how she had given the supplies she had brought for underprivileged kids to the kids at U.S. Caroline's work who were much more in need than the ones at the kindergarten. It was very weird, I didn't really understand any of the points she laid against Hunter and it just made her sound like a control freak, and super sensitive which she isn't most of the time.
          The rant cumulated in a huge attack on Caroline who I have never seen speak one bad word or do one bad thing to María. However in her mind Caroline is a backstabbing, sneaky, conniving person who has poisoned the minds of the other volunteers against her and she was unspeakably mad at her. This was just super weird and kind of scary. She sounded paranoid. Which again is very out of character for her. The things she said just made no logical sense, she blamed Caroline for neglecting her work by staying home with a cold, but she works at a hospital! She blamed Caroline for not being more of a mom to me and Hunter, but that wasn't what Caroline signed up for in the volunteer agreement! I felt so bad for Caroline!
            Needless to say Caroline is now moving houses. I'm worried about María though, she's managed to turn almost every volunteer in the house against her, and now I'm not sure what to think of her! The most ironic part of the conversation was that she was talking to me a lot about how Caroline neglected her work but she talked so long I missed my work!
            Then we all went out to dinner, me, U.S. Caroline, German Caroline and her husband Tómas, Lara, and María. U.S. Caroline and María sat at opposite ends of the table. It was a pretty fun night, but a little tense.
            I was nostalgic again walking home, not many of these beautiful Peruvian nights left! Hopefully María doesn't turn against me too in that time!

            When we returned to the house I had to say goodbye to all three Germans! German Caroline and her husband are leaving for a four day backpacking trip tomorrow called the Incan Trail that ends at Macchu Picchu, and Lara is leaving to go see her boyfriend in Aerequipa a different region of Peru. I won't get a chance to see any of them again before I leave!

You always joked that you were old enough to be me and Hunter's mom but you really did take care of us and keep us out of trouble, thank you so much for that! You're awesome and so much fun :)

Here's Lara in Macchu Picchu, although we didn't go together. She's really nice!

Day 24 - Come Back Hunter!

Wednesday July Twenty-second

      Hunter left today. At four in the morning but I woke up to say goodbye. I feel like I know her so well even though we've only spent four weeks together but I guess that's what happens when you spend 24-7 together! Haha! She's one of the funniest, smartest people I know! I'm going to miss her so much :(

However there is already a new volunteer in her spot!

   Lara: A German eighteen year old who is on her first trip out of Europe. She seems really nice, but very quiet and reserved. She dresses very conservatively. Her boyfriend is a Peruvian guy she met a week ago in Aeroquipa (another region of Peru), when he was her Spanish teacher, he's ten years her senior. Although she seems very sure he's legit, I can't help feeling like something is wrong. I guess I've just been warned so much about getting romantically involved with a guy down here.

   I felt like I was sleepwalking the whole time during work this morning, as I was exhausted from being sick and not having eaten enough recently. Although I did have a small breakfast this morning which was good. I mostly just sat motionless at my desk and yelled at any kids that needed it from across the room. Not that they really listen to me anyway.

     Then I ate a little lunch and went back to the local school in the afternoon to help the Englishteacher, Lara came along even though her actual work was in the morning in the orphanage. She, like everyone else is unsatisfied with her work as she too feels useless, and was looking for another work.

     She enjoyed it but in truth her thick German accent did make it hard for her to teach pronunciation!

     The teacher had a meeting after our first class so me and Lara went for a walk to a market where the meat section was something out of a horror movie, but the fruit smoothies were amazing! 

    We made it back with plenty of time before our next class, but the teacher didn't show up on time!

    We waited and waited, and talked to the very curious kids about our life in the U.S. and soccer, but still no teacher! We eventually realized she wasn't coming.

    So I took charge and taught the class! It was an awesome experience! I found it really natural and easy to teach. The only thing was that it was really hard to keep the kids attention, seriously the teacher sees everything so easily, there's no inconspicuousy like you think as a student! This one girl and boy of about fourteen spent the whole time attacking each other, I think they were flirting.

     We went out to dinner but I barely ate anything again, and then sleep! Oh if I've learned nothing about poverty or a different cultures, I've certainly learnt the importance of sleep! 

Day 23 - No, just no

Tuesday July Twentifirst

     I thought I was feeling a lot better when I woke up, but then had breakfast and it went sharply downhill. I attempted to go to my work, made it five minutes down the road, collapsed onto a bench, deliberated for a minute, and then turned around and came back.      

     I spent the rest of the day sleeping.

Day 22 - Home again

Monday July Twentieth

     I was incredibly sick last night waking up every few hours to have to run to the bathroom. My stomach was just doing all sorts of crazy things. 

     I just felt so lonely on top of everything, having to do everything yourself even when you're feeling so bad really does that, having no one to take care of you. No one to talk to, no that even cared.

     Packing was awful, I would stuff two or three things in my pack at a time and then collapse back onto my bed working up the energy for the next round. I still couldn't face eating so didn't have breakfast. Then to the airport to go back home, or at least my Cusco home!

     It was the most uncomfortable 45 minutes imaginable, every position that I tried more uncomfortable than the last, and every minute longer. 

     I was so, so glad to touch down in Cusco! Familiar territory! I didn't even have the energy to barter a reasonable fare for the taxi and so heavily overpaid, but at long last I was home! Yay!

     It was awesome to be reunited with Hunter and Caroline, and the other Caroline! 

    All I wanted to do was collapse but it was my first day at work at a local high school helping the English teacher. After I lay down and deliberated for a bit I decided I felt a little better and would go.

   However it turned out that feeling bad wasn't the only problem I had to face. I had to take a bus to get there and completely missed the stop and rode it to the end of the line. I got off very worried but luckily for me that was still within walking distance of the school. Phew! That was a close one! 

     It reminds me of the school I attended in Italy for one year, two stories, courtyard in the middle, with no greenery. It took me a while to find the right classroom but once I got there the teacher greeted me with a big hug and kiss. Peruvian people are always so warm and friendly even if you've just met! It's one of my favorite things about their culture!

      Teaching was a lot of fun! Although it was hard to get their respect as they were the same age as me and quite a few were older! However I was a lot of help, the first lesson the teacher was teaching was how to talk about time except she was teaching them to say o'clock after every time, such as 3:17 O'clock!

    I corrected her on many occasions but felt a bit bad about showing her up in front of her class so would say things like, that might be correct but it's more common to say, or maybe in other parts it's like that but in Colorado... Haha!

    I got home tired but feeling a little better, even ate a little dinner, and then slept even more! 

Day 21 - Food Poisoning round two

Sunday July Nineteenth

     So I had to wake up at the terrible hour of five this morning. I was so confused when I woke up, I wasn't in my room in Colorado, I wasn't in Cusco, and then I remembered I was in the Amazon Rainforest! How amazing. I stood up and as if to prove my point there was an awesome sunrise that morning.

View from my room

A little later

    And the sun!

I had breakfast and played with the cat named Gatto. No one knows where he came from but apparently he just showed up one day out of the jungle and as time went on he came closer and closer to the lodge until now he wanders around it asking to be fed and petted as if it were his home. 

     Then we went onto the boat where I was still exhausted from last night so I fell asleep and then I also slept on the bus ride back to Puerto Maldonado. Then I slept some more once we got back to the tourist company's office/hotel! I was starting to get worried about why I was sleeping so much.

    As it turned out, I was right to worry.

    I was awoken by a knock on my door. It was Melissa coming to tell me that they had spotted a sloth outside the room. I dragged myself out of bed and saw the sloth. It was actually quite cool as it was really close to the footpath, but as I was standing there watching it very very slowly eating a leaf I started feeling very very very bad. 

    Then it came. The food poisoning, at first I though it was a bad reaction to the malaria pills, but I later learnt that others had also gotten food poisoning from the dinner I ate last night, I went back to my room and ran to the bathroom, I then spent four or five hours in absolute misery, lying in my bed feeling like death, and only springing out to run to the bathroom. I couldn't eat lunch and could barely get up the energy to go to the bathroom. My stomach was doing somersaults and was cramping very badly. It was all I could think about.

    I really didn't know if I felt up to going on the afternoon trip to Lake Sandoval. But I gritted my teeth, really wanting at least one good experience from this trip and dragged myself up which took a mountainous amount of effort. It took everything I had to get to the boat where I immediately collapsed and fell asleep again.

    On the way there we also picked up another couple honeymooning, I really wouldn't have imagined humid mosquito filled Amazon as a relaxing honeymoon spot. Lake Sandoval was 3 km from the boat drop off. I really did not know if I could do it considering even standing was an issue at the moment.

      The walk turned out to be hell on earth. I finally found out why they gave us mud boots that went up to our knees after I went through mud pit after mud pit that went up and over my knee high boots. Sometimes getting stuck and needing to be wrenched out which required a lot of effort. The mosquitoes were also overwhelming and especially bad if you were wearing black or blue like me they would just follow you around in packs as those are their favorite colors. I am sure the jungle would have been really amazing if I could have focused on anything else besides how bad and weak I was feeling. 

The disgusting mud

Me and Melissa with a GIANT tree!

     A termite nest. Apparently if you ever get lost in the rain forest, eating these little insects is one of your best hopes of survival...yum.

     We eventually got to the lake after what felt like an eternity and I collapsed onto a bench at the end. Amazingly enough at that is that exact moment a troop of monkeys passed directly overhead in such a way that I didn't even have to get up from my bench to watch them! Yes!

Here is one sitting in a tree

Here is one suicidal monkey jumping about 10 feet between trees. They were crazy but awesome.

     The lake was also beautiful.

In the swap area that led to the lake.

And the lake!!

Wow, wow, wow!

Me on the boat, with a lovely finger close up. Sadly about five minutes into the boat ride my phone died and I couldn't get any more photos. I think this trip is cursed.

    We saw black Caiman (a different species than the ones in the river), tons of birds, turtles, and even a few more monkeys. It was definitely the best part of my journey to the Amazon. It even took my mind off of my condition for a bit.

   I didn't think it could get worse than the walk there, but the walk back was. I was feeling exhausted on top of everything else, my stomach was murderous, and the mosquitoes had gotten worse. We were practically fending for our lives against them.

   I slept on the boat ride back and then crawled into my bed as soon as we got back without eating dinner. I had not eaten anything for almost the whole day.

Day 20 - Down the river and into the rainforest

Saturday July Eightenth

    So the hut where I'm staying has four individual rooms but the walls are so thin that you can hear everything anyway in the other rooms. Which I'm sure was great for everyone else this morning when my alarm went off at 4:30! Haha! I was as usual late.

      We then all went Macaw spotting, we all got on one of the company's long thin boats and headed down the river.

On our way we also picked up a few more tourists from another spot along the river where they had been camping, they seemed very Peruvian and so I assumed that they were from Peru, but as we started talking I asked them where they were from and they said they lived in the U.S., and I asked where and they said Colorado, which I was surprised by and asked where again and they said Boulder!

   I actually found people from my hometown in the middle of the Amazon rainforest! Who does that! But if that's not crazy enough I started talking to the girl and she's also seventeen and goes to Boulder High! What are the chances! It was so crazy! I would be telling stories to her about things I did in Boulder and start describing something about boulder before realizing she already knows!

Me and Melissa on the front of the boat

    Then we arrived at the clay lick at around 6:45. It was deserted, so we sat down to wait a while, and what a while it turned out to be. There was not a single bird for the grueling next four hours we spent in the humid mosquito filled swamp, exhausted and miserable by the end.

The exposed wall of clay with no Macaws. The hours dragged until when they finally showed up it barely felt worth it especially because when they did come they only went up to the trees and not down onto the lick.

Through the binoculars!

Zoomed in

And more

    Although they were pretty cool I was ready to go back! At the very end when we were walking back to the boat I went ahead but a few others took forever, and of course when they finally arrived back at the boat I learned they had found this amazing spot where all the Macaws were on the lick. Oh well.

     During lunch I talked a lot with the guide as the American family is extremely quiet, apparently being a tour guide is a really hard occupation. You are away from home for two or three weeks at a time and he told me how this ended up causing him to get divorced and his kids, nine and two and a half barely getting to see him! How sad!

     Then in the evening I was supposed to go for a jungle walk with the shy American family but Melissa invited me to go with her family zip lining and I jumped on the offer! Zip lining through the jungle has to be one of the most amazing things to do, and something I've always wanted to do! 

      Oh if only it had been what I was imagining.

      It was not one of the most awesome things I've done, it was not at all how I imagined it would be. It was actually one of the most mediocre things I've ever done. The zip line was not high up in the canopy as I thought but in front of the huts that contained our rooms. At the lodge. The lodge!

    I was so disappointed but decided to make the best of it so went first, it was actually not awful, it went out over the river a little, and was pretty fun. The only hard part was that the guide told me to stop ten meters before the end, but I don't know how far ten meters is! How many feet is that! Anyway I ended up misjudging it quite a bit and stopping maybe 30 meters before the end and barely having enough speed to make it to the end! Haha, poor Melissa though misjudged it the other way though as she turned around backwards and couldn't see how far from the end she was and ended up slamming into the guy that was stopping us at the end!

    Me on the zip line!

    I then had five hours of free time to kill, it is actually very frustrating that I went to the Amazon, spent all this money just to sit in my room.

    The only thing that made it bearable was spending it with Melissa, it would have been awful by myself! We played cards and talked a lot! 

    Then finally we had another activity after the sun set. Caimen spotting, we all went back to the boat to look for Caimen a type of alligator. This was also disappointed because we barely saw any and looked for maybe 45 minutes. So all in all although of course being in the Amazon was amazing it was a disappointing day.

     

Day 19 - Change of scenery

Friday July Seventeenth

     I'm flying to the Amazon today. What?!?!?! That's crazy!

    So as is the norm here I was the first to get up and got ready by myself. It's amazing how much stuff one needs to pack for four days! 

     Right before I left for my flight though, German Caroline came back with her husband from the airport. Tómas! It's funny seeing him in real life after hearing so much about him! He seemed nice as I expected but I only got to say a quick hi as I was running late! Why does that always happen to me!

    So then I hurried to the airport but caught my flight to Puerto Maldonado with plenty of time!

     Puerto Maldonado: Very cloudy when I arrived, and so, so, so, humid! My hair instantly turned into an Afro! However not that hot, surprisingly, only about 70 Fahrenheit which is very abnormal for them. However it still felt stifling because of the humidity and because I had just come from Cuzco where it is normally more like 50.

 

View from the plane flying in. That's the Tambopata River part of the Amazon river system.

Met the nicest couple! Scott and Laura, Scott's from Australia, and Laura from England, they're here on their honeymoon! It was actually really funny as when I first signed up for this trip I saw that only two other people were signed up at the time and I said to my mum, I bet they're honeymooners and I'm going to be an awkward third wheel the whole time, and what do you know! 

     It turned out though, that there were others who signed up later for our tour :)

Getting on a boat to go up the river.

I feel like I'm in a documentary! I can't believe I'm actually in the Amazon! The most amazing rainforest! So cool!

My first wildlife spotting were Howler monkeys in this tree, no I couldn't really see them either!

And my second wildlife spotting, these are Capybara, the world's largest rodents  at around 140 pounds which is heavier than me!

My hut! Not to shabby! 

And the amazing view from my porch, with a hammock for me to enjoy it from. 

After an annoyingly long two hour free time we went for a night hike. It wasn't until I spent those two hours alone in the gorgeous main building that it sunk in that I had gone to the Amazon alone. However one thing you learn when you're by yourself is how to start talking to people and so in the lobby I meet this other group of high school students from Southern California. They told me I look like Amanda Sinfeild which I've never heard before, what do you guys think?

It was quite late by this point and so our guide took us on a night hike. The other people on my your turned out to be a family from the states who seem very stereo typically American to me. The two old, pretty fat parents were  not impressed with the lack of amenities or the fact that they were in the Amazon, and they had two grown daughters, one being stereo typically chubby and also not very understanding of the significance of what's around her, but the other one Nataly being very nice and worldly. It makes me wince to see why people don't like American tourists. I will try to appreciate the rain forest and understand it's importance.

Third wildlife spotting, this adorable frog! Awwww! 

Fourth wildlife spotting: a pretty elusive three toed sloth! Yay!

    

Fifth wildlife spotting: a wild cat! Although not exactly a Jaguar this cutie did wander in from the jungle and will attack if his demands to be fed aren't met! I've got the scratches to prove it! His name is creatively Gatto (meaning cat in spanish)!